kitsunegari: (Default)
( Jul. 11th, 2007 09:04 am)
i've been getting caught up in this whole facebook thing the past few days. it's a complicated and much more excellent than myspace sort of thing. it's security is far superior that's for sure! i think i'll be tweaking it for a short while at least. i wonder if i can use facebook to pimp my tunes...? hmmm....

the biggest problem i'm facing just now, not related to facebook, is that i have a lovely crisp script called "A Winter's Tale" sitting on the dining room table off to my left, and i can't find the motivation to read past the opening two or three statements about visiting bohemia or sicily! this is a problem, because i've got the task of playing Perdita when the company performs it on August 1st and 2nd. i really need to focus, but i can't. i'm worried that if i do a horrible substandard performance on this one, that'll i'll lose out on further, grander opportunities and be relegated to the amateur stages for the rest of my life. not that they're a bad place, they just don't PAY.

once upon a time, i had all the motivation a person could have in relation to my chosen path. i lived and breathed it, thought nothing else but it, and did everything in my power to get myself more involved. this was a difficult task, because, despite what most people see of me (the surface Kits), i'm a  rather shy and modest person who really needs to slap herself hard in order to get done what she needs to do. i love the buzz i get from performing to an audience, but it takes so much effort to simply force myself to make the first step in getting there, that it exhausts me. however, once i make that leap, it's all smooth sailing. i just don't know why i'm having to work so hard in order to get this to work. maybe i'm not used to the lack of direction and rehearsal. perhaps i need to call bryan and organise private workshopping of the script. perhaps i need to find out why i've begun reverting to the shy little girl i was 15years ago.

i think this stupid day job i have is the main cause. it takes up so much of my time and energy, i simply don't have enough left to do what i know i have to do in order to progress further in acting. it leaves me feeling mostly worthless. it's tedious and boring, and the store is ALWAYS cold. what have i done to anger the gods to be given the horrible task of checking for use by and best before dates? whatever it was, i apologise and am repentant, please make it stop and give me a task worthy of my skills! i'd much rather be doing checkouts than this job. but i'm not trained and therefore am not permitted to attend priority one calls. blech.

so, what can i do in order to motivate myself back towards entertainment as my sole focus? what can i do in an attempt get back on track? do i need a good kick up the arse for being so flakey and girly about it? suggestions please, I REALLY need them.

til next....
~Kits~ (close to full caffienation)
Bryan Nason rang on saturday afternoon.

he wants me to be involved in a paid rehearsed reading of the Grin and Tonic variety.

how cool is that?

it's all supposed to happen on June 1 and 2, i'll provide more information when i have it.

but yay!

Grin and Tonic!

woooooooo!

til next....
~Kits~ (can things get any better?)
omgwow!

i have had THE BEST DAY EVER!
so much information!
so many hilarious stories.
so much shakespeare!!!

and because i know it'll be the only time i get the chance to play the character: i get to be PUCK!!!!
we were asked to choose our dream roles, and that was my first choice (even if it was a lame story as to why: Dead Poet's Society [is the short answer]).
so throughout the week we'll be looking at our roles, memorising if we can, and performing them to each other by the end.
Bryan, Nadine, Maggie and Donald are all so COOL!!!

i am going to have SO MUCH FUN this week.

oih, and as an aside, we get to go to the Labour Party's Carols for Christmas (or whatever it's called) tomorrow before the evening session of 'shopping, because Wayne Swan asked G&T to do a few scenes (not the 'shoppers, we just get to watch).

it's just like a masterclass.
so breathtakingly fabulously fun.

*sigh*

til next....
~Kits~ (theatre and performance has NEVER felt THIS GOOD BEFORE)
*nervous excitement*
i start Grin and Tonic workshops today.
i'm tired, emotional and overworked, but i'm sure i'll have a lot of fun.
i also have a 'sort of' gig tonight. i think. i'm unclear about the details.
i'm racking my brain for the reason behind us 'bringing a towel'.

til next....
~Kits~ (only 3 weeks to go before sleep)
wow!

Nadine from Grin and Tonic just rang to get my address details (so they can send out letters thanking us for auditioning) because Bryan was apparently 'clever' enough to lose that information for a lot of people, and she made a note of mentioning "of you in particular"

i still can't believe i made that much of an impression on him!
this is absolutely AMAZING!!!!

Nadine also advised me to keep in contact with Bryan as well.

i don't know if it's the two really strong coffees i've had since i woke up at 1pm, or the excitement from more fabulous Grin and Tonic news, but i'm all jittery!

/lkasdhg lz.kdfjs ,.j7zsilnhf vsb

til next....
~Kits~ (now to get ready for work)
i'm in a quandry.

i would love to have a combined birthday/christmas party similar to the one i had last year, but it appears as though everything is getting in the way of it.

if i did it on a saturday, i'd be forced to take the night off work AND miss a Santa Spell performance (which I'll prolly end up being LX op for - long story, or rather not so), but there is always the option of a sunday. and then I'd have to check out the games schedule with Lang Park (evil stare across the street).

i can't do it the weekend before my birthday as i've got a 21st and Elton John (squee!) to attend on consecutive nights, and my birthday is a monday so no one will want to go out for drinks. december is virtually a write-off because of work AND Grin and Tonic workshops.

so what do i do?

it's looking to me like i should just forget the whole thing, which kinda sucks, because last year was so very successful (it was the first real party i've ever had for myself), and i've got so many friends i'd like to share the occassion with...

oh well, yet another year where the birthday festivities include a quiet night at home with a dvd and a bottle of something...unless i can come up with something else that fits into my hectic end of year schedule.

when the hell did i become so smegging popular?

til next....
~Kits~ (verging on exhaustion, but somehow still gliding through)
.

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